why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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