That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I checked into jail on foursquare
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Randomize
