Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
