Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
