you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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