Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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