Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
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