Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize
