it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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