At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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