judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
