used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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