I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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