I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
