found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
