So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
