I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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