If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
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