Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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