How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
