strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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