Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
