The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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