Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
