fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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