redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize