if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Randomize
