How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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