The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize