lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize