just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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