Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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