who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Randomize
