Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
