Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Randomize
