dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize