look no pants
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
