i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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