I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
i've created a new STD.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
