Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
