wanna go halves on a baby?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize