I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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