I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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