Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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