I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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