I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
