I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize