I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
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