i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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