the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
