i just google imaged poop.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I wear drunk well.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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